Personal Development Without Stress - A Journey Into Yourself

If you're into personal development you've probably already read a stack of books from the top experts in the field, and scoured the internet for more of the same - and probably discovered a few resources that, though they share the same info as other resources, speak to you in a way you want to be spoken to.

I've done the rounds too over the years - picked up techniques, tips, insights, some knowledge and understanding. But they didn't really change my life - I couldn't apply these resources practically.

Does this mean that they don't work? No! Just that they don't work for me...why not?

I come across a method that promises to turn my life around, realize my potential, create the success I "deserve"... it's all so great and stimulating at first, but I feel pressure the moment I start to put it into practice, and after a while I wonder why I'm doing it - following steps laid out by personal development experts who know nothing about my individual wants, needs, desires, personality, behavioral patterns or situation. If everyone followed the path of the guru we'd all end up where the guru is, and we'd become the guru. And that's the problem, because I don't want to be him, I don't want to walk his path - I want to be myself, find success and happiness in who I am and what I do.

And if I don't want to do things his (or any other expert's) way, then I have to find my own way.

I believe that we all have the means to be our own Life-coach. I believe we have the capacity to develop our own secrets-to-success and well-being... but to do this, we need to be clear about the purpose of our quest for personal development.

In the normal course of our lives we develop naturally - we learn and grow through the experiences and information we gather - but often we find ourselves moving in a direction that is not of our choosing or liking. This is because we've let ourselves be guided unconsiously by the flow of our situations. To change this, we need to consciously create the situations that create the experiences that we desire in order to develop in our prefered direction. So all we need is to be conscious of what we want, and the experiences we need. What's so hard about that? Why do we need the gurus?

Because they inspire us, because they open our eyes to ourselves, and because they give us short-cuts... techniques that we don't have to discover for ourselves, patterns to adopt, tips that work. They save us time and effort, and we don't have to reinvent the wheel - just follow our role-models. But therein lies the danger...we can adopt their systems, apply their techniques, but we will have to deal with the inherent pressure and stress that comes with adapting their methods to suit our individual selves... and if we don't book the successes that are promised, we're going to feel just as frustrated and lost as we were before we began.

So we come back to purpose - why the desire to develop? What to develop? To what level?

Look at it this way: It's your life, your development, your assignment, your task, your experience, your wheel, your path..... your life!

I believe that the greatest fulfillment you can attain in life is to know that it's your life you are living, you have designed it, you are in control - you are the creator.

In striving for this you need to understand who you are, why you are, and what and who you want to be. Only you can really answer these questions, and the search for those answers gives you a personal insight into yourself far greater than anything you can learn from another. This is part of the journey of your life - this is the reason for your journey.

If you take a roadtrip across country, you stipple out a route, you follow the road, you choose your tempo, you feel free to change the route on the way if you come across side-roads that interest you - you head in a general direction and your goal is to experience everything that you encounter on the trip. You wouldn't dream of taking shortcuts that get you to your end-destination faster...and you wouldn't dream of letting anyone dictate your route... it's your trip, your adventure.

Your life is a roadtrip.The tips, advice, experiences and knowledge of personal-development experts and coaches are like general maps of the layout of the land - but it's your journey - you do the planning and the driving.

The experts have gained their specific knowledge, either from others or from personal research into themselves. They have found insights and answers for themselves, and share them with others - the demand is great because the desire for quick, easy answers is great. But why would you want quick, easy answers into yourself... depriving yourself of the wonder of discovery of yourself? Your own personal research into yourself will provide you with all the answers you need, all the knowledge and insight you require to steer your life in your chosen direction.

The best books or seminars from personal-development experts can inspire you to take your life into your own hands, but more importantly they should inspire you to ask and answer your own questions, discover the sources of your own problems, and design the solutions to those problems. Knowledge and insight through self-experience, self-research, self-discovery... self consciousness.

There is no hurry, no reason for shortcuts - you have your whole life. It is a continual roadtrip of discovery into your individual human experience. There is no greater journey, no greater fulfillment than having made it your unique experience.